


The First One

by AluraEmbrey



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: F/M, Infidelity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-15
Updated: 2020-02-15
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:07:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22740739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AluraEmbrey/pseuds/AluraEmbrey
Summary: To all the ones I ever loved, never let you in enough. Not your fault I gave too much to the first one. --- 'The First One' by Astrid S
Relationships: Relena Peacecraft/Heero Yuy, Relena Peacecraft/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	The First One

**Author's Note:**

> **Spoiler:** Through Endless Waltz  
>  **Warnings:** Infidelity between non 1xR pairing  
>  **Author's Note:** Inspired by “The First One” by Astrid S.  
>  **Disclaimer:** I own neither Gundam Wing nor the song that inspired this fic.

_Flickering candlelight reflected off the crystal glassware like stars in the night sky. A low murmur of conversation filled the air, quiet as to not clash with the soft sounds of expensive utensils on equally expensive plates._

_Across from Relena eager and nervous eyes stared back at her. The expressiveness was clear and obvious for any and all to see. There was no mask, no reservation or holding back of any sort. What was about to happen was in plain view._

Yates was a wonderful man. Honestly, all of them had been wonderful. Their upbringings were perfect and their hearts generally in the right place. They knew the right people. They donated the correct amount to charity. Each of the men Relena had been paired with checked all the appreciate boxes for a woman that was one election away from becoming the next Foreign Minister of the ESUN. On paper the matches were perfect.

But paper did not consider passion. It cared none for the deep bond of a life spent working in tandem for a peace that was as fragile as the human heart. There was no way to account for the heartstrings of destiny that could tie two people across stars and light-years of distance.

_As a waiter passed, Relena felt the pit of her stomach sink further and further. She needed to get out of here before it was too late. Every moment spent in this restaurant was a mistake. Hell, every moment spent trying to pretend that she could ever build a life with any of the men that her loved ones suggested was a mistake._

In the place where love should have blossomed only guilt lived. It had settled in deep with roots that dug into the foundation of her very being. A flourishing garden of penance, one flower for each forced smile or misleading statement told to the men that thought they had a chance.

_“I’m sorry, but I have to take this.” Relena said to the man across the table from her. The look of disappointment on his face was palpable, but Relena grabbed her phone and walked away from the table anyway._

She had tried. Honestly, Relena really had. Each of the men was lovely in their own way. A fourteen-year-old her would be thrilled to have the attention of men like these. But her heart was never into it. Her relationships had been a series of failed attempts to normalize her life and expectations for the sake of others. While the true thoughts inside her head were of stolen moments that set her skin aflame with the power of a thousand suns. 

_Schooling her expression into one of great sorrow, Relena re-approached the table just as the waiter returned to ask about dessert. Yates looked eagerly up, but the expression was killed equally as quickly at her words._

_“Nothing for me please.” She addressed the waiter before turning to Yates. “It seems this can’t wait. My driver will be here in just a moment. Thank you for a lovely dinner and I apologize that I can’t stay.”_

_She knew that someone in the kitchen was taking an expensive ring of its hiding place and preparing to return it instead. But what had the ring represented anyway? Six months of dates in public places, their photo taken by the press and the ‘approval’ of a social circle Relena only maintained out of duty? What did any of that truly mean in their souls?_

_Guilt blossomed further in her as the porter opened the doors. Yet, outside in the cool night air Relena couldn’t help but feel relief._

Her inability to give the men she dated what they deserved wasn’t their fault. Deep down Relena had known from each start that it would never work out with any them. While on paper they were perfect, love did not follow logic and rational thinking. Science could sustain millions of lives in space, build weapons the likes of which their ancestors could never dream of, but it would never understand love.

_A non-descript black car pulled up in front of her. It wasn’t a Preventer car, but she recognized the driver immediately and her heart began to race. It should annoy her to be so predictable and so heavily watched, but she didn’t waste the energy. Instead, Relena slid into the front passenger seat and closed the door behind her._

_Prussian blue eyes didn’t so much as glance in her direction. But the car still pulled away from the curb and in it’s wake left behind her feelings of guilt. At least for the time being._

_Later, as the rough feeling of cheap sheets slid against her back, Relena couldn’t fathom feeling guilty for any reason. This was the right and true. Perfection could be found in each touch of scarred, rough skin against her own soft skin from life in a gilded cage. Her body felt like the centre of the universe, every ounce of atomic energy poured into her with each thrust until her simple human body could no longer contain the sheer force of their connection._

_Panting, Relena held Heero’s body tight to her own, the weight like a blanket of peace on her heated skin. Soon they would part ways and the garden of guilt would bloom again. Yates would need to be dealt with and the papers would continue to report about her lack of luck with love. But the truth was in this bed and in this moment._

_She could never love the men the world thought here perfect for her. Relena had given too much of herself to the boy she found on the beach and regretted nothing._


End file.
